The other day I went on an escalator without thought.
While this might seem simple and mundane to you represents a breakthrough for me.
Those who have known me for a long time, or those who know me well, are aware that I have certain irrational and inexplicable phobias.
I am terrified of escalators to the point where I will wait for the elevator or walk up steps.
I hate crossing bridges and overpasses where traffic is zooming by underneath. For those of you who live in Chicago, I would walk to long route to get the North Avenue Beach avoiding crossing over Lakeshore Drive. For those in OC, I would take the bus to the South Coast Plaza (about a mile from my house) to steer clear of walking over the 405 on Bristol.
I used to text my roommate on my bus ride to work to double check if I turned of the iron…and it did not even matter if I had ironed that day.
And many more…
All of which make me neurotic at best and anxious at worst.
Yet, last Sunday without white knuckles and deep breaths, or even any thought, I went on an escalator…multiple times.
What’s more is I have traversed the 405 overpass on Bristol three times this week.
I wish I could say that I had some big insight or rationality crept in; however, I am pretty sure it is the Prozac. I remember in January preparing to get on an escalator at a Whole Foods in Chicago. I was having lunch with my friend Gail the day after I decided that when I returned to OC I would medicate. As I prepared myself I remember thinking, “I cannot wait till the drug takes effect so I can function like everyone else.”
I think it would be helpful if people shared their phobias. The ones you are ashamed of and try to hide.
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